A Balanced Life – David Henzel
a balanced life
Creating a balanced life is essential to maintain and improve the quality of home life and work. Most entrepreneurs become so engrossed in work that we completely forget that having balance in life is a key ingredient in achieving success.
In this episode with David Henzel, a fast-moving entrepreneur and has bootstrapped various businesses including technology startups, e-commerce, and brick and mortar, he shares examples of business principles that can be applied to home life.
Applying business principles to your home life and relationships will create a perfect harmony in your life.
Being clear about your roles and responsibilities can take away friction in a relationship.
Know business principles that you can apply to your home life
Learn how to stay focused on your business
Your mission and vision statements can help you make right decisions and stay on track.
How to avoid “I do everything, you do nothing” type of arguments.
Learn the best way to solve problems at work and home.
TRANSCRIPTION: A BALANCED LIFE – DAVID HENZEL
Hey there, Thriving Launchers, on today’s episode, we’re going to talk about living a balanced life, how to prioritize what you do, what your partner does, what you do in business, what your teammates do, and how to have those conversations in a way that works.
We are here with David Henzel. He’s an entrepreneur like a lot of you. He’s bootstrapped various businesses including technology startups, e-commerce, and brick and mortar.
All right, guys, are you excited? We are here with David Henzel.
Are you ready to launch?
Thank you for having me on.
Let’s talk a little bit about the entrepreneurial journey and some of the insights that you’ve had.
What are some of the things that come to mind when I talk about being an entrepreneur, and what’s important?
There are a lot of things that are important to being an entrepreneur.
Struggles To Have A Balanced Life
Something that I struggled with was not the entrepreneurial side of things, but preferably having a balanced life, and having a private life aside from business.
I was always the guy that focused 120% on the business and hoped that the home life somehow magically works out. That’s something that comes to mind about entrepreneurship.
Something that’s important and something you talk about is how to create rules and responsibilities in your home life and your relationship, not just your business.
Can you tell us a little bit more about that and how it helped you live a balanced life?
Sure. It’s a funny story how we came up with this.
One day, I came home after a long meeting about the roles and responsibilities in my business, and I was sitting on my couch at home, and my daughter needed a diaper change. I point this out to my wife saying, “Hey Honey, look. Emma needs a diaper change.” And my wife was upset that I pointed this out to her and didn’t do it myself, and I was pondering like, “Why are we fighting about this?”
Roles and Responsibilities in a Balanced Life
My wife does it most of the time, changing the diapers, and I’m okay with doing it, but how should I know that it’s my turn at 8:30 PM on this Tuesday? And then, I realize that we never talked about the roles and responsibilities in our home life.
The very next morning, we sat down and split these roles and responsibilities out, and this took away 80% of all the friction we ever had in our relationship because all this unspoken expectation went away.
It was, so eye-opening that applying these simple business principles to our personal life was so impactful to have a balanced life that we started to do more of this. This had a crazy impact on our general happiness.
How did that transfer over to your business in the way that you changed your personal and business life which?
It changed my business life pretty drastically, but it’s maybe almost a different story.
My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer three and a half years ago. This was a pretty big wake up call for me given the fact that I also lost both parents through cancer. It was pretty extreme for me, and this made me think about me, laying on my deathbed and looking back in my life, and thinking, “Did I do what I was supposed to do? Did I have the impact that I want to have?” and “Will I die would regrets?”
I always knew that I want to have a significant impact on people’s lives, a positive impact of course. I was just kind of “living the American dream” of amassing as much stuff as possible, and making as much money as possible.
I realized my business was not having a significant impact on people’s lives. I was just having an impact in our employee’s lives, but none in the bigger picture. I wasn’t living a balanced life.
Applying Business Principles to Have a Balanced Life
After this experience, I decided to make sense to sell my business even though it was thriving and to do something else that has a more significant impact. I decided to pick up this idea to teach this framework that my wife and I came up with applying business principles to our home life. I teach this to other people, and this is what I’ve been doing for a while now.
Can you give us some clear and actionable tips, things that we can do right away to start applying some of this stuff at home to have a balanced life?
There are tons of stuff, and those are simple things once you think about the elements of a balanced life. If you would not do this in the business, how catastrophic this would be.
Things That Can be Applied at Home To Have a Balanced Life
Those would be just having regular meetings, sitting down and planning, setting goals, budgeting. All this stuff you take for granted in the business, apply this to your home life.
A fundamental one that you usually do in the business is that you sit down and think about what’s your vision and mission of your business. What do you want to achieve with this business? What’s your goal? And what’s your ‘why’?
Most people have no clue what they want out of life. They just climb up the ladder of success in a frantic manner, without checking, is this ladder leaning against the right wall?
It’s a compelling experience to sit down with your spouse and to figure out what you want out of life.
Talk with Your Partner How to have a Balanced Life
A cool helper to do this is when you sit down and write down your bucket list. What kind of experience do you want in your life, and it’s an excellent tool to find out what you want, and you’ll learn a lot about your partner. It gives you a great list for future gifts for anniversaries.
So, when you did a process, what did you come to?
You mean my bucket list or what I want to do with my life?
Your ‘why’ when you came to this place where you needed to sit down and do your ‘why,’ and write your bucket list.
What did you discover? What did you and your wife learn? What did you realize about the importance of balance in life?
Discover Your ‘Why’ To Having A Balanced Life
For my wife, she wants to live on a farm, have lots of animals, and be away from everything, and move closer back to our family because we’re originally from Germany, and we live in Los Angeles. We moved back to Europe. We live in Turkey now. And so, this was a big thing for my wife.
For me, was having an impact on people’s lives. This was the big thing for me, and I picked a few things and put them on my list, and managing happiness, the course was the first thing I tackled.
I can imagine it would be scary to think about doing this process because, what if you have very different dreams or goals than the other person, and then you have to navigate and manage that.
Handling Deal-Breakers on Having a Balanced Life
It’s something that I was wondering because I want to help people. I want to bring people together, but this could mean that I bring people apart because when you sit down and say “Hey, what do you want out of life?” and your partner wants five kids, and you don’t like kids, then this may be a deal breaker.
Many other things could lead to deal breakers, but I think it’s a good thing in case this happens because then, at least you know it now, and you can rip off the band-aid. It sounds a bit cruel, but I think it’s for the better if you’re not made for each other that you kind of find out earlier.
And then, how did this change the way that you interact with other entrepreneurs and business that you do and decisions around how you treat your business and work?
Having Clear Mission and Vision Statements to Have a Balanced Life
I sold my business early last year, and the most significant impact that I had was once I had the clear mission and vision statements, and knowing what I want out of life.
0Similar to your business, your vision statement is a filter to make better decisions because you have ideas all day long and you could go in ten different directions. But if you want to stay focused with your business, you just run these ideas through your vision and mission statement as a filter. Then, you can make the right decisions and stay on track.
Running Decisions through a Filter to Have a Balanced Life
I use it in the same manner in my personal life. When I have an opportunity to work or whatever it is, I run decisions through my filter, which is my mission, vision, and to my core values. Then, see if this is aligned with what I want to do or the person that I want to be or want to become.
It makes it easy to say ‘No’ and to have less fear of missing out some big things these days with social media and opportunity, and many things we can do to stay aligned and stay on track, and not get distracted.
I just love giving the Thriving Launchers something clear and specific they could walk away with about living a balanced life.
Can you give us kind of a picture of how we can start this process of sitting down with our partner and negotiating these roles and responsibilities?
The rules and responsibilities are pretty straightforward.
Usually, you’re together for a while, and when you live together, you have kind of a system like the things that you take care of the household and the things your partner takes care of the house.
Be Aware Of Things You Have the Most Friction to Achieve a Balanced Life
You just list out the things where you have the most friction.
For my wife and I, it was mainly revolving around things with my daughter. Who puts her to the bed? Who picks her up? Who does X, Y, Z?
Sit down and talk about these friction points and negotiate out whose taking care of which part.
Then also, list out all the things that are already in the grooves that are on track.
For example, you go out shopping, and your partner does the cooking or whatever it is, and spell them out as well.
Setting the Framework to Having a Balanced Life
By doing this, you just set this framework. I don’t know if this is in your relationship, but we had this a lot like “I do everything. You do nothing,” arguments.
It’s straightforward. You just take out a list and say, “Hey, I would do this and this.” If you want to move something around, then you have a foundation to talk about it, and it’s not just an uncontrolled discussion.
It’s such a beautiful process of discovery. It’s like I never take out the garbage, right, Luis? He’s the one that always does it. There are things like that.
Then, even talking with your business partner and it happens to be my business partner is my romantic partner. We have this kind of discussions a lot, and they’re helpful.
I love what you’re talking about bringing to mind today.
Before we go, is there any last tip you want to give the Thriving Launchers that they can apply today on how to live a balanced life?
One thing would be maybe how to solve problems in a relationship because usually, we only talk about the issues we have in our relationships when we fight. Then when we fight, we just want to win the argument. We don’t want to solve the issue. That doesn’t help in having a balanced life.
Be Solution-Oriented To Having a Balanced Life
I was just thinking about this in the work scenario when your Vice President of Sales is not bringing in the sales you want, and you would not go there and yell at him. You would ask him like, “Hey, what’s the problem? Do you need more leads? Do you need more budget? What’s the issue?” You are solution oriented.
What works great is when you sit down once a week, and you have your family meeting, and you talk about the things that you were maybe fighting about, and you pick one. Then, you brainstorm about how you can make sure that this problem is not happening again in a solution-oriented manner. Not being emotionally involved into this.
It’s pretty miraculous what solutions and workarounds you can come up with and to remove these issues for good out of your life versus fixing stuff with duct tape.
All right, there you have it, Thriving Launchers. Be solution-orientated, come to meetings with a mindset of positivity or at least a mindset that is going to think about solutions, and not just the negatives or the downs to have a balanced life.
Thriving Launchers, I hope you got some takeaway from today’s show, and keep thriving you all.